Read with Caution
Have you ever come across one of the many posts on Facebook (and the likes), that lists the “many symptoms of” or “unusual symptoms” or “what you may not know about” fibromyalgia? Wow, I’ve read so many of these. I think they’re good for our family and friends, helping them to understand and appreciate what it is that we go through day after day!! But WE don’t need a list of the weird and wonderful symptoms, we know them intimately. So for fun, I figured I would write a list for us, the ones living with it. Hopefully theres at least one you can relate to and that it gives you a short reprieve, a medicinal giggle!!
WARNING: If you’re of a sensitive disposition, under the age of 18 or currently operating heavy machinery, please redirect your cursor into the search engine and type in either: puppies or kittens and click on images or videos. Thank you for your co-operation.
You’ve been warned, further reading may require parental consent and pinching of salt! HA!
1: What you may not know about fibromyalgia and it’s many sufferers; there is a common side effect whereby it completely fucking robs them of all that they value in their lives. They lose dignity, face and any previous merriment (also see jovial), not to mention, friends, relationships and being a functional member of society.
4: It is also common amongst the chronically ill, to have to tolerate daily doses of the bemused “head tilt” response from anyone who has either a) never heard of said illness or b) thinks its all in your head and most gratifyingly c) thinks its an excuse to suck the system.
7: It is advised that every social interaction must be accompanied by the obligatory story of either how insanely well or how hideously awful their friends, neighbours-dog walkers-husbands-mistresses previous lesbian lovers’ fight with fibro turned out. Either which leave a sour note on a chronically ills palette, either they should be doing better, or its about to get worse!
9: You may not realise that a Fibro Warrior is prescribed a very specific and life like mask in which to wear at all times to warrant not looking sick. This is commonly referenced by most, thats just how good the prescribed mask is, “you don’t LOOK sick”, JOB DONE!
?13: The most commonly unknown symptom, which crosses the boundaries into all chronic sufferers, is a mild form of Tourettes Syndrome. Most common ticks include phrases such as “for fucks sake”, ‘what the fuck” and “mother fucking (insert object of disappointment here)”.
447: Unless experienced first hand, it is hard to detect, even to the trained eye…when a sufferer is at the end of their rope. You know when your counting straws (???) and you get to the last one…the tether ends…previously mentioned straw inadvertently breaks the donkeys back (not sure what I did with the straw to become an accessory to that crime??) Wits end (or never begins as this post proves!) The point is, you never know when a sufferer is hanging on by a thread, on the edge of the cliff.
When someone that is chronically sick GETS sick, (i.e: with something which is not covered by either their diagnosis, or a side effect of their medication-if such a thing exists?!) e.g: a chest infection, cold, toothache, a broken appendage; they are, for all intents and purposes, DYING. Now I’m not talking “man-flu” dying, I’m talking death dying!! Look at it in these terms, imagine having flu, yeh-pretty rotten, achey, tired, blocked up in every way, we all know the drill (especially the men-hands up for man flu!) then on top of that, some drunk has beaten you senseless for no reason. So your battered and bruised from head to toe, AND you’ve got flu, but then, you eat your favourite take away and get food poisoning, SALMONELLA no less!! So at this point your glued to your toilet whilst simultaneously vomiting in your sink. You can’t even keep water down so your dehydrated and subsequently get the headache from hell. So to recap, your a black and blue, snot monster with exorcist style evacuation from every orifice. This is a taste of the symptoms of chronic illness BEFORE the every day bugs catch you!! If you can imagine having all of the above simultaneously, then you’re probably a warrior yourself. Keep fighting the good fight!!